Talking to Strangers

[DaisukeOrDark]

Heres an old one.
ALSO
DONT CLICK THE LINK!

Quote:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Have you ever thought of trying cannibalism?
You: Tried?
You: I practice regurally
You: :3
Stranger: Really?
You: Yup.
You: You see
You: a human brain liquifies at 120 degrees ferenheit
Stranger: Would you eat someone alive?
You: Hmmm
You: I dont know
You: Not a child
You: Heavens no
You: They are way to springy...
You: now..
You: an obese man
You: maybe... withthe right ammount of sedatives
Stranger: will you eat me?
You: Hmm...
You: Age and race?
You: Smoking or not
Stranger: Im white, 20. I dont smoke.
You: any past illnesses?
Stranger: Not that I know of.
You: where do you live?
Stranger: Michigan
You: another factor
You: Oh?
You: I live in Wisconsin
You: this could work out
Stranger: Are you serious?
You: Yes
You: Would you like to meet by the docks?
You: In GreenBay that is
You: Or we could go to like...
You: Little China
You: They are really good about not talking. biggrin
Stranger: Are you a boy or a girl?
You: I am a man.
Stranger: Me too
You: Well yes you are 20
You: Oh! I forgot.
You: Whats you BMI
You: and your height and weight
You: that would be nice to know
Stranger: Uh... Im about 5'6
Stranger: and like 150? I think?
You: Okok.
You: Oh that should work
You: nice weight to size ratio.
Stranger: How are you going to do it?
You: Eating you?
You: Well.
Stranger: Yeah
You: I like stirfry. But. The flanks are my favorite part...
You: But. The rear chops are delish
Stranger: Uhm
Stranger: Would you mind eating me alive?
You: Hmmm
You: depends
You: which part.
You: Cause some parts of teh human organs are riddled with disease
You: and best to be cook properly
You: like human liver should always be cooked
You: hearts ok to eat raw though
You: I much prefer to cook my food
Stranger: I see
You: yah that way you get the best textures and flavour
You: now I need to ask. What are your meals like
You: also
You: if you want to be eatin by someone closer to you I have a site you could use. There are always people who will eat yuou alive
You: http://lemonparty.org/
You: its a message board
You: you'll just need to post in the intro board and state you are willing to be consumed alive
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[Arcanas]

haha...you sent him to lemon party...nice.  

[Soreph]

This one's good...

Stranger: hello
You: Wanna buy a pen?
Stranger: sure, why not
Stranger: what kind of pen?
You: pick a color
Stranger: orange
You: nope, can't have the orange one!
You: pick another!
Stranger: orange is my favorite though!
Stranger: ok, indigo
You: Nope, cant have the indigo one!
You: pick another!
Stranger: emerald
You: Nope! Can't have the emerald one!
You: pick another
Stranger: white?
You: Nope! Can't have the white one!
You: pick another!
Stranger: yellow!
You: Nope! Can't have the yellow one!
You: pick another!
Stranger: red!
You: Nope! Can't have the red one!
You: pick another!
Stranger: those are all the colors i know
You: Cheapskate!
You have disconnected.  

[God-Raped-Me]

OMG LEMONPARTY! I remember that site. Sometimes it was ok... it would give you a flash of some weird old man dancing, then I wasn't so lucky once..... gonk  

[Soreph]

Stranger: こんいちは
You: LOOK! IT'S GODZILLA!
Stranger: 何？
You: godzilla. big, green, dinosaur like thing that attacked Japan.
You: Are you stupid or something?
Stranger: グーゲルのほんやくをつかりますか
Stranger: ばかですね
You: ... english person does not understand. English person summons GODZILLA
Stranger: Godzilla isn't a Yugioh monster
You: What happened to being Japanese?
Stranger: oh.. ごめん
You: ...anyway... GODZILLA! ATTACK!
Stranger: righto
Stranger: i dont care much for manga, so ill pass
You: You're more fun when you're Japanese...
Stranger: Correction: I am more fun when I speak Japanese.
Stranger: English is my first Language
You: I don't care!
You: GODZILLA! GET YOUR a** OVER HERE!
Stranger: へん。。。
You: Godzilla crushed Japanese person!
You: Hooray!
Stranger: for god's sake, im not japanese
You: You are to me.
You: Aren't you supposed to be crushed or something?
Stranger: no.
Stranger: Tell me, if i wasnt speaking japanese, would you be coming onto me for sexual gratification?
You: GODZILLA! MAKE THE SILLY HUMAN GO SQUISH AGAIN!
Stranger: ...
You: I'ts super effective!
Stranger: wtf? now pokemon...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.  

[Arcanas]

LOLOLLLOLOLLOLOLOl That was awesome!  

[Trish the Stalker]

Quote:

Stranger: hey
You: Hi
Stranger: asl
You: 200, Androgyne, Purgatory
You: You?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Quote:

Stranger: Female?
You: Since my surgery, yes.
Stranger: How old?
You: 56.
Stranger: Ummm, Have a good night and Paint a room!!!

Quote:

Stranger: hey I'm not going to lie all I want is some naughty pics(but only if ur a girl)
You: Um... I had surgery and I'm a girl now
You: Does that count?
Stranger: no thatdoesnt count
You: Sorry to burst your bubble.
You: Have a pleasant evening and good luck finding some biological females

-Formerly La Belle Isolde-

 

[Arcanas]

Lol. that last one was awesome Belle  

[Trish the Stalker]

I also ended up playing DM for some guy while he roleplayed the Jabberwocky.

-Formerly La Belle Isolde-

 

[blue_green]

Quote:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello.
Stranger: gal?
You: Gal??
Stranger: girl?
You: Does it matter?
You: And if so, why?
Stranger: i will know
Stranger: to whom i m tralking
Stranger: talking*
Stranger: bcause then only
You: Hm, if that's your only reason, then, yes, I am female.
Stranger: yes it matters a lot
Stranger: den why u didn't told me earlier....................lol
You: Cuz if you want to flirt with me or something then you're outta luck. Not only am I a weirdo nerd girl (despite my rockin' looks) and a lil' bit crazy, but I'm kinda leaning more towards girls.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[Chexley]

I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts.
There they are a'standing in a row!

Wow. That was the shortest conversation I've had in my whole life!

Quote:

Stranger: hot horny girl?

You: Nope.

Your conversational partner as disconnected.

"Give them a twist, a flick of the wrist!"
That's what the showman said!

 

[blue_green]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ALIENS!!!
You: Hello.
Stranger: Where did you put the cheesecake maker?
You: I put it in the cupboard back at the restaurant.
Stranger: Well can you get it I need to for tomorrow I need to make 5784937640763763847 cheese cakes for the bake sale tomoorw
Stranger: and I am low on cheese can you pick some up
You: Can't you make Paul do it?
Stranger: ohh and miss cockupass called she wanted me to tell you to drop by here place around 6
Stranger: Paul is dead he chocked on a cheese cake remeber?
You: Oh yeah.
You: Poor Paul.
Stranger: did you forget about your brother that fast
You: Wait, he was my brother!?
Stranger: ohh no I miss him
Stranger: yess he was darling
Stranger: dont you remember he was your evil twin?
You: No! -cries- I don't remember!
Stranger: who through apples at you when you sleep
You: So that's where those bruises came from!
You: D<
Stranger: Ohh no we are out of milk
You: Oh no!
You: -summons a cow-
You: I shall milk this cow for you. And pasterize it.
Stranger: Thanks hunny I dont know what I'll do without you
Stranger: My aching back
You: Well, since I'm milking this cow we still need someone to get cheese and the cheese cake maker.
Stranger: we will get charlie and lola to get it
You: By the way, it's a good thing Paul is dead, cuz he was sleeping with your mom. Your mom didn't know who he was, though.
Stranger: Well that mother fucler
Stranger: ********: He truely was.
You: Don't worry.
Stranger: He shall burn in hell with his evil munchkin
You: I think I remember something about Molly saying she was going to flog his corpse,
Stranger: He prolly eat all the cheese...itwas swiss cheese dont wanna know what he done with that
You: Oh God...
Stranger: and who spilled all the milk...wait is that milk
You: Okay, now we need some lolipop people to help work on the cheese cake.
You: Where is it? It might have been me.
Stranger: ahhaa
Stranger: taste it to see
You: o.o
You: Bad idea.
Stranger: I saw it upstairs near the computer
You: Oh no!
You: That can't be milk!
Stranger: and near a clown costume
You: Definately not milk!
Stranger: with candy and toys
You: Oh no!
You: Who was using the computer~!
Stranger: dammit Paul
You: I think we need to get our pitchforks and torches...
You: Oh, it was Paul?
You: Okay, that's fine.
Stranger: prolly well ita Paul
Stranger: but there can be someone else
You: Oh no~!
You: Let's get the lolipop people to do a DNA test!
Stranger: alrightiee and I will try and constrate to make more cheesecakes
You: I shall milk the cow once the lolipop people are on the job! -goes off to get the lolipop people-
You: >e-mailinfohere<@hotmail.com
Stranger: >e-mailinfohere<@hotmail.com
You: Okay, the lolipop people are on it!
You: Is Lola back with the cheese yet?
Stranger: yess she dropped it of and went to play pokemon
You: And what of Charlie?
Stranger: I dont know Charile hasnt came back yet
You: Oh noes! Well, I have finished with the milk! So, while it pasturizes I shall go get him!
You: -time skip & scene change- Oh my! The restaurant is all spooky!
Stranger: Ok be caerfull look out fot the big bad wolf
Stranger: *bes bad guy*
Stranger: I seeeee youuuu
You: Oh noes! Who ish there?!
Stranger: Itss meeeeeeeeee
You: Me who? -backs against a wall-
Stranger: dooont you reconize meee????
You: How can I? Your voice is all spooky-like and I can't see you!
Stranger: Oh snapp sorry forgot to come out of the closet
Stranger: Itss me.....Paul your evil twin...but as a ghost. an.evi.ghost.
Stranger: evl*
Stranger: evil*
You: Oh teh noes! Paul the evil ghost! Why have you come back to haunt me?!
Stranger: mwahahahaha *cough*
You: Is ***** and mother ******** not enough? Do you want to go for incest, too?
Stranger: Yess I have me fellow friend
Stranger: Well I can see your a detective now and firgured out that all the white fluid all over the clow costume and candy is mine
Stranger: and yess I banged your mother tooo
Stranger: dun dun duunnnnnn
You: -le gasp-
You: Actually, I didn't know that. The lolipop people hadn't come back with the DNA results yet, but you just confirmed it for me.
Stranger: I g2g mom is home add me alrightiee =)
You: I already did.
Stranger: okk see ya later
You: You are in my msn once you accept.
You: Bye.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.  

[blue_green]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: ALIENS!!!
You: Hello.
Stranger: Ahahahah you sound like my friend xD well so hows it goin?
You: It goes. It goes.
Stranger: yes it does
You: Like the flow of life... just go with the flow... and be caught in a net...
Stranger: xD lie a fish
Stranger: like*
You: We are all fish.
You: And there are plenty of fish in the sea.
You: So go catch a fish.
Stranger: no thnx i have one wink
You: You do? You mean you didn't eat it yet?
Stranger: no im not a vampire...........or am i?
You: Vampire?
You: But vampires don't eat fish.
Stranger: yea
Stranger: you dont get the comparrison
You: Or do I?
You: -evil laughter-
You: Am I confusing you yet?
Stranger: nah
You: Awesome.
Stranger: xD
Stranger: Asl?
You: 19/female/US
Stranger: 18/female/washington
You: Sweet!
You: I bet you are.
Stranger: i bet i am too
You: My teeth hurt.
Stranger: tht sux my neck hurts
You: Well, if you weren't a vampire, you are now.
You: Bwahahahaaaa!
Stranger: O.O
Stranger: o
Stranger: i see
Your conversational partner has disconnected  

[blue_green]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: FISH!!!
You: Hello.
Stranger: STICKS!!!
You: Yes!
Stranger: HA HA HA
You: Ground.
Stranger: BEANS!!!
Stranger: IDK
You: Yes!
You: Banana!
Stranger: SPLIT!
You: W00t!
Stranger: WOOT!
You: Pocket...?
Stranger: KNIFE!

You: Ooo!
You: Burn!
You: Take that!
Stranger: lol
You: You and me, we make a good team.
Stranger: Yea bahahaha
You: We gonna win dem word association finals fer sho.
Stranger: oh yea, MOST DEF!
You: Blue!
Stranger: SKY!
You: Bird!
Stranger: SOUP!
You: Turtle!
Stranger: SOUP!
You: Bread!
Stranger: PUDDING!
You: Choclate!
Stranger: CAKE!
You: Frosting!
Stranger: SPRINKLES!
You: Ice cream!
Stranger: CAKE!
You: Pan!
Stranger: CAKE!
You: >.>
You: Brownies
Stranger: ICE CREAM...
You: Cake!
Stranger: FROSTING!
Stranger: O_O
You: Peanut butter~!
Stranger: SANDWITCH
You: Ham!
Stranger: SANDWITCH!
You: Bread!
Stranger: *_*
You: ...
Stranger: PUDDING
You: Jello!
Stranger: MOLD!
You: Moth.
Stranger: BALL
You: Beach!
You: 19!
You: Q!
Stranger: I'm sorry g2g this was fun tho, THANKS!
You: No prob.
You: Take care.
Stranger: You too
You: ^_^
Stranger: ^_^
Stranger: LOL
You: Bye.
Stranger: bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.