Welcome to Gaia! ::

I've been to cemetaries a few times. They're lovely places; beautiful, but yet I feel somehow a bit strange. Like my presence is disturbing someone. I usually feel a bit awkward in cemetaries, but I like them.

I've only ever been to two funerals in my lifetime, both were when I was still young and didn't know what death means. I have, however, visited funeral homes; peaceful, yet a little strange for me as corpses unnerve me a little bit. No idea why.

Only once in my life have I felt the presence of a departed soul. Now, if you ever happen to come in contact with Amy Lee, don't tell her I've told you about this, it's pretty personal. I feel a little bad for sharing it. When Amy was six years old, her younger sister died at age three. In tribute to her, Amy wrote the song "Hello", featured on Fallen as track 9. When I found out about this, I listened to the song and wept for the poor child. And then I thought I heard someone in my head telling me, "Don't cry... Please don't cry.... I'm here, I'm alive..." I offered her a place to rest with me, namely, a pillow that I laid beside me in my bed. Ever since that night I have tried to sleep with a pillow beside me. This has almost lead me to believe that I am possibly a reincarnation of this child, which might explain my attachment to Amy. However, that thought is NEVER to be mentioned in front of her. Ever. I usually feel very selfish saying that, not to mention it would probably be emotionally stressful for Amy to think about it.

I usually commemorate the dead with thoughtfulness, tears, possibly flowers on graves or what have you.

When I was around 8 or 9, Johnny, an old friend of my grandfather died. I had never known my grandfather, seeing as he died when I was very young. I had come to think of him as my grandfather. The day he was going to die, me and my younger sister were given the choice whether to see him in his last moments. I was too scared to, my sister chose to do so. I felt guilty afterwards.

I didn't do much for his death commemeration except remember him. I don't remember if there was a funeral.

i go and say hi with friends!
and make a date out of seeing mommy with my boy toy heart
and go to see her on day of the dead 3nodding

Sometimes, on the anniversary of a friend's death, I'll light a candle for them. I'm not really Christian, but my mother was raised Catholic and sometimes I find myself going into our cathedral and leaving a votive in front of an icon. It makes me feel more serene.

My dog died recently. I'm happy for him, because he died naturally and painlessly in his sleep, with friends all around him. But of course I still miss him. I have a big wad of his fur (taken from combing him the last time he was shedding). Whenever I see places he would love, I think of setting a tuft of fur there. Sometime soon, I'm going to walk around the city and leave a few strands of fur in all the parks.

i like to write poetry and,as with my grandmas recent passing,i wear or carry around one of their possesions

i am wearing a skeleton key my grandmother gave me that goes to an extrewmely old clock

Honestly, I do become sad, and I have time thinking about the people I miss, remembering all the good times. A person is not who they are because of their age or the condition their body is in, so I try not to think of the dearly departed in that way, but for how kind they were. I honestly do not fear death, and I believe no one's death is a mistake. Our whole lives are laid out infront of eternity, the past is frozen, the present is on going, and the furture to us is naught. Any time compared to eternity is nothing, so the idea some people die too young I don't agree with. The less time I spend on the earth, the less I am attatched to it, the more freely I will accept when my time to shed this shell has come and it is time to move on. God, seeing past and future all in present, giving us time so although he knows our choices we can still have the freedom of will and individuality to live and believe as we choose, puts things more into perspective. If Jesus the Christ did raise from the dead as accounts say, and died on the cross being mocked and beaten without mercy, then believing in him, death has no sting.

I am planning on having a small memorial service for those two boys who shot people at their school nine years ago. They were not goth, but the fact they felt that badly, then shot themselves afterwards, I refuse to see them as soley the villians, they were the ultimate victims. The least I can do is pray and have something dedicated to them and others like them, because although most the world may see them as monsters, devils, they are precious. So the least we can do for them is to try to teach people to have mercy and kindness, not respect but love.