Angelus1987
My marriage has been struggling too and I know that we need prayers. We have been married for about 9 months and can't seem to stop fighting. I have done everything I know to keep from fighting, but my wife thinks that we have to fight every other day to become closer. However the fighting only pushes me away and makes us both feel worthless. We really need prayer and really appreciate them.
Question: are you guys reading scripture together, especially the passages about how married couples should be treating each other? I'm celibate, but when it comes to family-problems, I've come to find that when scripture is being read outloud as a group, they have to submit to the word of God and they don't fight while it's being read most of the time. Other times, certain passages may bring up issues that happened in the past, which they feel bitter about, but at least it gives an opportunity for the issue to be discussed, for someone to forgive/ask forgiveness, and to reason it out in a calm fashion. Of course, for that to happen someone has to submit.
In terms of marriage, I know it's the woman who should submit to her husband, but looking at Jesus (God) who humbled himself to our level, even to wash the feet of his servants, I take that to mean, "going beyond what's required of you to fix/maintain the relationship". The one who knows better should submit for the sake of peace/reconciling. If by "fighting" you mean you're yelling at each other as well, or just plain bickering about everything, at least one of you is going to have to stay calm, and ask the other "why are we fighting about this?", "we can talk about this, but let's be calm about it", "you go ahead first, I promise not to interrupt". One of the biggest issues in my family is that people cut each other off, so it escalates (no one is submitting to anyone). It's going to take discipline and prayer to dominate the tongue, praying in the midst of the fight included, but it can be done.
Quote:
Ephesians 5:21-33 (NIV)
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Footnotes:
a. Ephesians 5:26 Or having cleansed
b. Ephesians 5:31 Gen. 2:24
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing[a] her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Footnotes:
a. Ephesians 5:26 Or having cleansed
b. Ephesians 5:31 Gen. 2:24
related scriptures: Colossians 3, 1 Peter 3
In the meantime, I'll put up a petition for you smile
@LuckyTaco: I hope your situation is improving as well. I didn't make a reply before, but I did pray for you too. Perhaps the advice I'm making now may help you further on top of all the help you've already received.
