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 Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 9:04 am
crying So I very foolishly got attached to this one kitty who's been at the Humane Society for several months, and I pretty much got the hubby talked into a second kitty. Then I took him to meet this kitty and he decided he doesn't like her and if I want a second kitty I need to pick someone else.
I should have just brought the kitty home instead of letting him see her first. She's kind of funny looking - he thinks she looks kind of like a rabbit, which I guess isn't too far off the mark, and didn't get hooked by her personality in the two minutes he spent with her, so he said no to her.
There's another kitty at the shelter I really like too, but I wanted to adopt this one, because she's been there a long time; is black, which already reduces her chances of getting adopted; and she's very small, which I like. She's also very playful, which would be a good match for Violet.
I dunno, I don't want to press the issue of this specific cat, and end up with no second kitty, but she is my first choice for second kitty.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 11:48 am
Anyway you can change his mind? Or get thim to agree to spend a little more time with the kitty?
I'm kinda in the same boat with the 'foolishly getting attached'. The kitty we're cat-sitting is becoming part of the family. We've already had him for a month and will probably have him for five or more months. By that time he'll be a year old and horribly attached to my 3 cats and us. She's going to yank him out of here and he'll have no cats to play with, and be stuck with an owner he doesn't even know. (she basically abandoned him at her apartment with her room mate, which is why I had him for the month of December. She was supposed to take him back in January when her room mate moved out and she moved back into the apartment for a month. In February, she was moving back in with her parents and I was supposed to take him back. Instead, I've had him straight through from when I got him). She hasn't even come to see him. I want to tell her to forget it, we're not giving him back so he can be miserable, but I can't.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 11:58 am
I'm going to see what I can do, though he seems to already have his mind made up about not liking the kitty. sad My next choice for second-kitty is a tortie at the Humane Society, but when I explained what tortie looked like he didn't seem too impressed either. He suggested I see if I can being her home for a day to visit, which I think I will do, though I need to make sure she's worm-free first. sweatdrop
That sucks that you're in that position. I'd definitely be reluctant to give Walter back to an owner who can't even be bothered to come visit with him. Do you think maybe your friend could be convinced to let him stay with you and get another cat for herself? Obviously she can't be to attached to him yet, if she's not even coming to see him.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:12 pm
Well, at least that's something. It'll be harder to say 'no' to her when she's been with you for a day. As long as she's not a little terror anyway.
You could always try the "if you don't want it, it can be all mine and I'll take care of everything," route with the first one. That's how I convinced my fiance to get our third kitten, who, by the way, he now loves. xp
I'd probably end up taking the other cat too. sweatdrop She's really not responsible in the least. I was talking to her for the first time in over a week a couple nights ago and she told me that "either you keep him, or I'm giving him to the SPCA". I told her, "well, if you're going to give him to the SPCA, I'll just keep him, keep him". She thought I meant until she can move out and take him back again. I think I'm going to have a talk with her in a couple months after Walter's gotten nice and attached. It's just cruel to take a cat out of their surroundings like that.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:20 pm
It really is. It's like having a nanny take care of your kids throughout their whole childhood and then firing her and expecting them to have a close bond with you. It's not going to happen and it'll just be distressing and confusing. By the time she's ready to take him back (if she plans on taking him back at all, which sounds dubious) Walter will see you as his mum.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:27 pm
He already does, I think. He follows me around, and started a new habit last night. He'll cry and mew until I pick him up and put him on my lap when I'm on the computer.
I wish I didn't have such a guilt-ridden conscience, but I can't tell her 'screw you, Walter's ours now!'.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:30 pm
Want me to do it for you? ninja
Won't someone please think of the children kitties?! gonk crying
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:40 pm
rofl
Oh, you don't know how tempting that is.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:50 pm
It can be awfully hard to take a stand against a friend, especially when they put you in a position of choosing between putting the friendship at risk or doing the right thing. I was in a situation once of knowing that the right thing to do would be to report one of my friends for child neglect, and man, what a shitty position to be in. gonk At least I was able to take action on that and not necessarily have her know that it was me.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 1:00 pm
I'd never imagine being put in that situation. Of course you have to do what's right, but it still would be so difficult to do.
I jokingly told my fiance that we should let her give Walter to the SPCA, then we go and adopt him.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 1:18 pm
Haha, that's one way of doing it, and might actually be easier for everyone in the long run. You'd think if she was really considering dumping him anyway, she'd just leave him with you.
Maybe you could suggest that? It'd probably save her money too, since don't most shelters have a bring-in fee?
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 2:42 pm
Yeah, I think it's a 50 dollar drop off fee. But, she sees it as if we're going to keep him for ourselves, then we shouldn't mind keeping him until she takes him back again.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 5:15 pm
Ah, I guess if she dumps him at the SPCA there's that break of possession, and if you went and adopted him he'd truly be your cat; whereas if you just hang on to him forever, she thinks she could take him back at any time if she was so inclined?
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 5:54 pm
Exactly. She has to give over possession of him for me to actually feel right about keeping him, and for her to realise that she can't just take him back whenever she wants to.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 6:10 pm
That makes sense. Why create trouble for yourself in the future by not making sure she has a clean break with the cat.
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