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 Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:00 pm
That's not my intent at all. One of the things I'm going for is that their relationship is strong because of equality. Maybe it should be thrown in that he's extremely attractive himself. A paragon of masculinity. Not in a Ahhnold way, but in a strong protective way. He is tall, thin, muscular, powerful, and attractive. His face is hard, but in an angular, attractive way, clean cut, and beardless. His hair is not short, but not long, and seems neither combed, nor messy. He has an aura of power, of command, but not one that's threatening. People seem to find themselves unnecessarily drawn to follow what he says, because he is so overpowering to the senses. Much of that nature is because he is so true. He is powerful because he is selfless like his wife. He may seem very focused on power, but his ultimate aim is the liberation of the people of the city, just like her.
Is that an improvement?
I'm okay with the organization being the first to fall, so long as these two characters don't die. After their organization falls (hopefully when it looks like they're on the verge of a massive political and military victory) they would most likely seek shelter in the Resolution Division.
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:13 pm
A joke could even be made about the similarity between the Revolution and Resolution names.
Some guy for the Resolution division: "Never thought I'd see you two here"
Wife: "Well, your organization had the most similar name. Revolution, Resolution. We guessed we'd be safe with a one letter change."
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:23 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody That's not my intent at all. One of the things I'm going for is that their relationship is strong because of equality. Maybe it should be thrown in that he's extremely attractive himself. A paragon of masculinity. Not in a Ahhnold way, but in a strong protective way. He is tall, thin, muscular, powerful, and attractive. His face is hard, but in an angular, attractive way, clean cut, and beardless. His hair is not short, but not long, and seems neither combed, nor messy. He has an aura of power, of command, but not one that's threatening. People seem to find themselves unnecessarily drawn to follow what he says, because he is so overpowering to the senses. Much of that nature is because he is so true. He is powerful because he is selfless like his wife. He may seem very focused on power, but his ultimate aim is the liberation of the people of the city, just like her.
Is that an improvement?
I'm okay with the organization being the first to fall, so long as these two characters don't die. After their organization falls (hopefully when it looks like they're on the verge of a massive political and military victory) they would most likely seek shelter in the Resolution Division. Yes, much better, but he's still missing something in my eyes, he seems too perfect. Besides, I have double the amount of male characters, so I'm trying to focus on making more female characters, so she'll be in the spotlight mroe often 3nodding (I even turned some of my male characters into females sweatdrop ) Believe it or not, the Resolution Division is the one that falls after yours xd I see it now Blessed Blade's character "You two seem to attract defeat"
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:32 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody's Character "Yeah, maybe we should join the Green Division and get this mess over with altogether."
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:39 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody Bohemian Rhapsody's Character "Yeah, maybe we should join the Green Division and get this mess over with altogether." Actually, at that point in the plotline there's a humungous plot twist 3nodding The Green division loses control and a nano virus breaks out, turning anything made of flesh into cyborgs and making anything metal into a robot. That battle is fought by some of the more popular heroes in my story, so your characters will re-appear in a small saga named "King Wars" and in the last one named "Apocalypse" 3nodding
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:40 pm
Neitsabes Actually, at that point in the plotline there's a humungous plot twist 3nodding The Green division loses control and a nano virus breaks out, turning anything made of flesh into cyborgs and making anything metal into a robot. That battle is fought by some of the more popular heroes in my story, so your characters will re-appear in a small saga named "King Wars" and in the last one named "Apocalypse" 3nodding
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:43 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody Neitsabes Actually, at that point in the plotline there's a humungous plot twist 3nodding The Green division loses control and a nano virus breaks out, turning anything made of flesh into cyborgs and making anything metal into a robot. That battle is fought by some of the more popular heroes in my story, so your characters will re-appear in a small saga named "King Wars" and in the last one named "Apocalypse" 3nodding Indeed whee Sorry if I went a little overboard, I can talk about my story for hours and hours xd
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:52 pm
Teehee. I understand. wink You can do what you'd like with the husband. You said my character was a diamond, but that he was nothing special, so I tried to diamond him, but now he's uber diamond. Do what you need, but if at all possible, make them equal to each other, because that's the strength they bear.
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:54 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody Teehee. I understand. wink You can do what you'd like with the husband. You said my character was a diamond, but that he was nothing special, so I tried to diamond him, but now he's uber diamond. Do what you need, but if at all possible, make them equal to each other, because that's the strength they bear. hmm... Describe to me their relation, their lust, affection, and care for each other, they could be a good model for a perfect couple :U~
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:59 pm
They're hardly intimate in public. Very subdued, but marked by a strong respect for one another's judgement. In private they are quite intimate, in a very quiet way. Very sexual, intimate, very loving. I would say perfect couple, but for the kind of people they are, they're perfect for one another. They don't argue, and it doesn't seem like they talk much, but it's very obvious, despite their strong wills and independent spirits, they very much need each other.
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 9:06 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody They're hardly intimate in public. Very subdued, but marked by a strong respect for one another's judgement. In private they are quite intimate, in a very quiet way. Very sexual, intimate, very loving. I would say perfect couple, but for the kind of people they are, they're perfect for one another. They don't argue, and it doesn't seem like they talk much, but it's very obvious, despite their strong wills and independent spirits, they very much need each other. Excellent :3 Your characters might be used before Rebirth... ninja
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 9:10 pm
Whoops... I mean to say that they're NOT the perfect couple, but that they're perfect for each other.
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Posted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 9:12 pm
Bohemian Rhapsody Whoops... I mean to say that they're NOT the perfect couple, but that they're perfect for each other. Perfection doesn't really exist. But that's covered in the third part of my story, right before Rebirth xd
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Posted: Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:14 pm
ok i wanna be in the story...i am exactly like sango from inuyasha....except maybe more of a loner.....i have dark brown hair and dark eyes....ill give more details later im tired and going to bed...
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Posted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 2:38 pm
xbumblebeex ok i wanna be in the story...i am exactly like sango from inuyasha....except maybe more of a loner.....i have dark brown hair and dark eyes....ill give more details later im tired and going to bed... If you're a loner than how would my characters run into you? :U~
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