Welcome to Gaia! ::

Tam smiles at her and waves her into the kitchen. "It's a bit cooler in here." he says as she makes her way in. "I'd say we could go outside to drink our tea. It's cooler, true, but those benches and chairs out there get rather damp at this time of the evening. No need sitting on a soggy seat when there's a perfectly good dry one not 15 feet away. So how have you been, Saferia? Everything going ok for you back home?"

Tam lifts a graceful brow and nods. "Then we shall talk of whatever you wish to speak of. I wasn't trying to pry, m'Lady. I merely wished to know how you felt about things, nothing more."

Tam sighs. "You were not the cause of your mother's rage and sorrow... she alone bears that responsibility... she may have used you as an excuse, but no child is responsible for the actions of their parent. And to be truthfully honest, if you feel that strongly that you do not wish to do that to your cubs, then perhaps you should not have any. Feelings protect and nurture... they only harm when the one feeling them is unbalanced."

He studies his fingers for a tiny bit then smiles thinly at her. "Children die... sometimes physically but almost always emotionally unless they are loved. A babe ignored grows up stunted, incapable of feeling, like a plant denied the nutrients it needs to flourish. But give them what they need and they will indeed bloom. You do not wish to feel, but you have an assortment of others who love and care for you and who fear you are dying inside. And I suspect it is not a lack of feeling you fear but a surplus... Am I correct? For so long you have nothing... now it wants to burst it's bounds. You fear losing control of this surplus, so certain you are carved from the same stone as your mother was. But people change and you have many many people willing to help you in this... trust them. Your lover, your friends, your kinsmen... tell them how you feel. Enlist them in your efforts to understand the why of how you feel. If you feel as though you are out of control, go to them, tell them so... warn them, if you must. I expect you will be surprised in that none of them will run away. They love you, Saferia."

"Reality can be jarring. I know, I've just had a heady dose of it myself. I almost went down yer path and it frightens the living daylights out of me still. Fantasy is far kinder, at least on the surface, especially those we tell ourselves. But our fantasies blind us to reality, which I wouldn't begin to tell you how that works. But you yerself are living one. Open yer eyes, Saferia. Look anew... the blatant truth is... far more than one loves you, my dear... trust me, I cannot tell an out and out lie... half truths, maybe... as long as I do not intend to mislead... but this is pure honesty. I would no more deceive you on this as I would harm another living being. You are loved..." says Tam gently, reaching out across the table to take her paw in his hand.

Tam sadly shakes his head. "Nay, dear one... that is the illusion... Yer reality is..., those days are long gone. It is time to put those pain filled memories aside and embrace better ones... memories sweet enough and strong enough to carry ye through the bleak times ahead.... Or I fear you will not be alongside yer brethren at the end... The dark one will use yer fears against ye."

Tam pours his strength into her, enveloping her in his inner warmth, his guiding light. "Be strong." he whispers softly. "Be brave. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain." He slips a ring from his neck, a ring so heavy on the chain now, he can barely carry it. Up to now it has been an easy burden, but no more. Placing it before her he offers it silently, waiting for her to pick it up. He no more knows it's purpose than it's maker did, but somehow he knows it belongs to her.

"I don't think so." says Tam softly. "I've worn that thing for years now and it's never made it's will known before, except to claim me as it's bearer so that it will find the one it seeks. I know not what it's purpose is for. It was a wise old stone, which had weathered deep within the earth, resting and waiting until it's time. As for an icy nature... my own core hasn't been all that warm of late. I know not what you have heard from the others, but I fear that in a matter of hours, I achieved what you have been striving to attain for a lifetime and trust me... it isn't worth it. As someone one very wise and far more earthy than I once said... there are far better ways to plan one's funeral. Trust me, Saferia... you and I have far more in common than you might think... we both feel far too much and have a hell of a time dealing with our own emotions."