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 Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 8:06 pm
Emnast sighs. "Given the present state of things, that is probably best. And I would welcome a visit... I was avoiding the others because I honestly did not know how to deal with this. I was afraid they say something and I'd respond and somehow either give out information they do not need to know or say something that would trouble they terribly. I was there when Shia died... She died in my arms... so to speak... and Ai was very close to his sister. How do you talk about things like that... what do you say?"
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 8:09 pm
*Kero smiles*
If you ever figure it out, Emnast, you should write it down. Nobody knows how to do it, not even me.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 8:18 pm
Em sighs and goes to sit back down at the table... though in truth he is merely sitting on the floor and eating off the table. He's a little to big for the chairs that sit around it. "When I first came here... while the twins were just babes... She tried to talk to me about it... I'm afraid I wasn't very polite at the time... I said some things that were down rigiht nasty, told her to leave me alone... know what she did? She hugged me... hugged me and thanked me... for what I do not know... we haven't talked about it since..."
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 8:38 pm
*Kero nods*
I understand. And Em...if you ever do want to talk. I am always available.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 8:44 pm
Emnast nods quietly. "I'm not ready yet... held it in too long, I suppose... but maybe... someday. There are things I should probably tell you... things I should apologize for... all sorts of stuff... but I don't think right now I could handle it very well. Last week... I probably could have... this week her memories are a little too close."
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:04 pm
*Kero smiles*
I forgave you long ago, big brother. So did Mama, and Dad. And so did Stella. Now you have to earn the forgiveness of the hardest one of all: Yourself.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:10 pm
Emnast smiles thinly at him. "When one thinks about how long I lived like that and how short this life I'm now living is... one might realize I've got a lot to be sorry for... probably far more than I'll ever be able to make amends for."
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:20 pm
*Kero laughs*
You already did it.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:25 pm
"How, by allowing the love of my life to die defending me from a rightful death? I don't know, Luceil. True I lost something there.. something I'll never be able to replace... but all that I did back then, I did for her... because I knew she wanted me to do it... sometimes I can't see how my motives have redeemed me...I mean... I knew she was right... but had she not come into my life...." he sighs and shakes his head.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:31 pm
*Kero smiles*
Because you did what was right, even during your dark times. I kept tabs on you, and you never caused more suffering than you were ordered to...exception sitting here, of course...nor did you revel in suffering, but in your own power. You weren't sadistic, but proud.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:35 pm
"It was all I ever wanted... power... pwer to do that which I could not do otherwise..." whispers Emnast softly toying with the remains of his sandwich.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:38 pm
*Kero smiles*
So how am I any better than you, big brother? Or rather, how are you any worse than me? Because I was the same way for millions of years.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:41 pm
Emnast shakes his head fondly at Kerobian and sighs. "We were both a couple of fools, striving for power when acceptance was what we truly needed."
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:48 pm
*Kero nods*
And now we have it, so let's stop beating up on ourselves and enjoy what we have.
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Posted: Sun Mar 28, 2010 10:01 pm
Emnast chuckles softly. "Sounds good to me, little brother... so tell me, just what are you attempting to do with Ari anyway?"
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