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 Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:08 pm
I remember talking to someone once about a friend of theirs. This friend was avidly into roleplaying (DnD and stuff). Anyway, when the friend got married, their wife really hated the whole roleplaying thing, and so this guy gave it up...for her.
In my own opinion, I think that's stupid. It's not like you have to share every single activity with your partner. And how much can a person actually love you if they're unwilling to let you have your own hobbies? Or am I wrong? Would you give up your favorite hobby if it annoyed your significant other?
Also, what's the one hobby or thing that you wouldn't give up for anybody?
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Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:24 pm
I've given up plenty of things for financial reasons, but that wasn't really because the significant other asked me to do so. It was just that we didn't have the money for those things anymore.
I've never been asked to give up things or hobbies, but I have been asked to (and in some cases tried to or did) give up certain habits.
Alcohol, for example. If I was with someone who was opposed to alcohol and didn't want me to drink, I would strongly consider giving it up. It would depend on their reasons, of course.
I wouldn't give up drinking coffee for anyone, or my music. :3
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Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:29 pm
Well, I'm a pretty selfish person. If someone can't accept me as I am now and as I wish to be, they can head right on back out that door. Course a big part of that is accepting that I haven't been looking for and am not currently interested in an intimate relationship.
I can see giving up drugs or something physically or mentally harmful, but a D20 never killed anybody (who didn't try to swallow it.) It's not like the man was doing porno films on call and as a volunteer. D&D is good clean (actually your mileage may vary) harmless fun.
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Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 6:39 pm
I'm guessing you guys didn't see that Tom Hanks movie?
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Jafthasleftthebuilding Vice Captain
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Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 11:22 pm
 "I've been burned so bad...
I'm a lot like Phaeton on this one. It's a bit ridiculous to expect someone to give something up if it's not causing physical harm.
Like... Say I was still smoking, and now I'm dating Kerri. She has asthma, of course I would stop smoking for her. But if she asked me to do something like stop gaming or stop roleplaying, I'd look at her like she was crazy and say "No". Then again... not really a good example because we both like videogames and RPing. But I can't think of anything right now that I like and she doesn't.
Point is, if something like this were to be brought up, there'd be a very long talk about it because I wouldn't be pleased.
...but I still play with fire!" 
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Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 11:25 pm
Jaft I'm guessing you guys didn't see that Tom Hanks movie? That "movie" was anti role-playing propaganda from crazy religious fundamentalists who believed D&D to be akin to satanic cult ritual and practice. We all know D&D nerds are harmless.
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Posted: Wed Sep 08, 2010 11:29 pm
...You'd think that'd be something that came up before the wedding. But whatever.
I'm with Phaeton and Roland. I'm willing to change myself to a certain degree. I'm willing to give up bad habits. But nothing that I'm super into.
That said, I'd probably make sure early on that my guy shares my hobbies. Or is at least ok with it.
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 1:25 am
I'm under the strong impression that a healthy relationship is based off of common interests. If I have a problem with a passtime my partner has I would state it early on in the relationship and see if I could make a compromise. In the event that I couldn't stand the activity I would brake it off right then and there. I wouldn't FORCE someone to stop something that brings them happiness, and I wouldn't stand someone trying me to quit mine.
The only times that I would try to change the habits of someone else is in the case of a harmful substances like tobacco, or alcohol.
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:50 am
I'm with Phaeton, Roland and Invisible.
Srsly, wat?
It's not like his hobbies are dangerous things :/
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 4:49 am
If my partner doesn't want me to be who I am then why the ******** be with me at all?
I'd never give up my hobbies/other stuff unless there was a very good reason
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 8:32 am
I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts.
There they are a'standing in a row!I... have been in a similar situation; however, it's not exact. In a past association with a particular individual that turned remarkably sour, he distinctly told me that if I were to pursue my hobby of drawing, to do it outside of the house where he wouldn't have to look at it or be around it. It was the same way with my Japanese.
After that, I decided that if a guy wasn't comfortable with the way I am and the hobbies I develop/chase after, he's not worth my time.
I'm very tolerant of behaviors now and strive to be even more so. It's when I become enraged by a certain behavior, or habit for that matter, I'll set my foot down. I'm no longer naive to think I can change people. "Give them a twist, a flick of the wrist!"
That's what the showman said!
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 11:56 am
I wouldn't give up any of my hobbies for anybody... I don't think occasionally playing my DS or Starcraft, drawing, writing, reading, rollerblading, watching anime, or browsing the internets (to name the favorites) is harmful to anyone. Perhaps if I partook in these activities a little excessively, I'd lighten up on it for the sake of squeezing out a little more time with ma significant other... But I'd never entirely quit. My hobbies are a part of what defines me. If they don't like the entirely innocent things I do, they don't like me.
There are certain things I'd be willing to stop, however. I wouldn't call them hobbies; they're just little things I'll partake in when I'm very comfortable with my friends. They might be construed as more intimate than a significant other would care for. For example: I used to be in a relationship where my boyfriend grew very uncomfortable over the way I loved to play with my friends' hair. The detrimental effects that was having on him greatly outweighed the positive effects on me, so I just stopped doing it then and there.
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Jafthasleftthebuilding Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 12:10 pm
Phaeton We all know D&D nerds are harmless. I thought about it, I slept on it, but there's no way I can agree with it. Especially when they start wearing the armor and the wielding of weapons. They're a revolution waiting to happen. ;P I wouldn't give up my way of eating. So, if he/she wanted to go to a fast food restaurant, he/she must go alone. Alone. O_O
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 3:09 pm
Jaft Phaeton We all know D&D nerds are harmless. I thought about it, I slept on it, but there's no way I can agree with it. Especially when they start wearing the armor and the wielding of weapons. They're a revolution waiting to happen. ;P Okay, I won't deny LARPers are creepy, but you're more likely to get struck by lightning then to have one of them to kill you with their foam or plastic swords. If one of them threatens you, call the cops. They drop out of character immediately. Edit: scratch that, just throw a fireball at them. They scatter.
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 12:06 pm
Phaeton Jaft I'm guessing you guys didn't see that Tom Hanks movie? That "movie" was anti role-playing propaganda from crazy religious fundamentalists who believed D&D to be akin to satanic cult ritual and practice. We all know D&D nerds are harmless.
Anyway, I would give up a lot really. As when you get married you are suppose to become more adult and leave childish things behind. (At least from my POV and the teachings I believe in). So yeah I probably won't be using this site, rocking out to Pokemon music and things like that. Cause I will have to be an adult woman 100%.
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