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My first "Flash Fiction"

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Ame Za Rain

PostPosted: Thu Jun 25, 2009 8:10 am


For my Lit. class we had to write our own "flash fiction". I actually really like how mine turned out so I thought I would share with you all!! <3

Comment and tell me what you think!!


Obsession

As I lay in bed my heart beat was steady. This is surprising, because I am staring straight into the eyes of the man I love through window of my bedroom. What’s funny is Zach is dead, well supposed to be dead, but here he was staring straight at me. His eyes were not his usual forest green, but were now a dull slate color. As I looked closer at him his face was pale and almost a translucent color. He lightly tapped my window, flashing a quick smirk towards me. He knew I was looking at him but how? The room was pitch black and the only light that shown through the window was the soft pale light from the moon.

I slowly sat up and flipped the blankets from my legs, and swung them over the side of the bed. As he continued to stare at me, my heart began to pick up in confusion. How could he be here? Zach had died; I saw them bury his body just a week ago. When I reached the window I heard him talk in a light whisper. “Hello Lesilee. I have missed you.” He says with a smile. That is when I saw them. Teeth, and not just any regular normal teeth, his canines were long and pointed at the ends. I stifled a scream, and took a step back from the window, and when I did he frowned.

Should I open the window for him? Will he harm me? I still love him but does he still love me? All the thoughts ran through my head and yet, as if unconsciously, I went back to the window and opened it. “Zach” Is all that I could say. He jumped through the window with one swift movement and grabbed me into an embrace. I stood in shock at first, and then slowly began to cry. I embraced him back.

I felt him pull away just slightly, and started to tilt my head to the side. No... I thought. This cannot be happening. I began to pull away, but Zach’s grip on me was to strong. I felt the sting then, a sharp pain in the side of my neck. I also began to feel a cold wetness dripping down, and knew it had to be blood. My blood. Things started to blur then. My room started to fade with the darkness of my room. My death was coming and the man I love is causing it.

I suddenly felt warmth on my eye lids and forced them open with a gasp. “NO!” I screamed. I looked about my surroundings and noticed nothing but my living room. In my lap lies the book I had been reading for weeks. “Interview with a Vampire.” I said aloud. “Damn my obsession.” I set my book down on the side table, and walked to the kitchen for coffee.
PostPosted: Thu Jun 25, 2009 6:33 pm


I like it. 3nodding

Despite it's briefness, I could feel the girl's roller coaster of emotions. I love when people can do that with a character. It shows the writer has talent. <33

And, of course, the end made me giggle. X3

Hiromi-Ohira
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RLM
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2009 6:56 am


It was a fun read~ 83
I'm not sure what a flash fiction is, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. XD
And like Romi said, I could really feel the character's emotions;
and I love it when I can easily put myself in a character's place~
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The Old Notebook: A Subforum for your writings and for those who want to RP!

 
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