Welcome to Gaia! ::

I've changed a lot in the past ten years.

When I was 12 I started getting depressed because I never grieved properly for my uncle. Lots of crap got backed up and festered. I was a pretty depressed teenager. I was passive, agreed with everyone about things I didn't agree with, low self esteem, let people kick me around. I drank too much, I hurt myself. Pills and shrinks. s**t got worse every year.
A couple of years ago I was trying so hard to get better but nothing was working so I decided to indulge my depression and hit bottom as hard as I could hit it. Believe it or not, that made me better. It was like... I shot down as fast as I could and exploded out of it instead of getting stuck.

Now I'm great. I don't take any crap from the people I did back then. I have a very strong personality and it's all mine instead of what others made it (someone once referred to me as being a doll they played with). I know who I am and what I want and I'm not scared of anything any more.
I think that's the big change- not being scared.

I'm very different. For the better.

I think the thing thats changed most about me would have to be I have more self-confidence.
And the color of my hair, which did help with that also.

My personality didn't change a bit, thank the devil twisted lmao, but the way i am and my confidence has a lot. I use to be a real cry-baby. If i didn't get what i wanted i would pout, cry, or give attitude. But since i grew up a bit (only 17) i learned that i can't be like that. So i stopped my crying, took things as they were and i don't take as much crap from peeps as i use too xd I turned dark and work dark clothes more. Peeps thought i was just a poser but i didn't care what they thought of me. It's what i like! GET OVER IT! scream lol
Am i happy with who i am now?...kinda but not really. Im trying to get ride of my selfishness. I really want to, but its hard! But im still motivated to stop trying to make things about me and make it bout other peeps! 3nodding heart

Ascending to god hood only counts if I am recognized as THE force

I'm glad we're limiting this to the last two years, or I'd be here all night lol.

Two years ago, I had completed my first semester at university. My confidence in myself was extremely high and my optimism was incredible. My music taste was extremely diverse, and my dress sense was kind of non-desciptive and generic, by intention. I had an easy time making friends and was rather extroverted, and generally quite hyped to be alive.

Since then my journey through life (how poetic?) had included going to every type of music event imaginable - live gigs, festivals, nightclubs of all genres, raves. I've heard more genres of music and more artists than my head can possibly hold. Everything from Glastonbury to Infest, from Download to Mera Luna.

I've also experienced a lot as a person. I've been jaded and faded in ways, and made stronger and happier in others. I've experienced successes and failures which have taught me to be confident or just taught me lessons.

I have moved on a little in the past two years, but at the core, I feel the same. If there even is a core - one of the beauties of life is that its so subject to change.

You know what one change I wish I was able to make mentally...

I wish I had the capacity to be a b*****d.

Because it would things easier and much less complicated for me sometimes. -_-