if ill be gone...

• Artist: Ophiuchis
• Description: for filipin0s...
• Date: 03/22/2009
• Tags: gone

if i ever ill be gone 2morow,
Hope youwont forget the things i did for you
even if its not enough to satisfy you,,
i just want you to know that in every single thing i did,,,
i have been a true person to you!!!

Comments

[ScarletNguyen]

its ok but i think that you should have more detail to how the person is feeling

[wmiinkdeys]

This is very "to the point!" Be more blunt. It feels like a break-up love poem. Guy's still lusting over relationships torn. Suicidal at most. But good job. Very expressive in 5 lines max. Fix the writing and dont add to many commas. Good job.