• He was huge like a giant and wise like an old kung-fu master.
    The way he tapped on the four buttons,
    the way his virtual monsters attacked.
    His large white shirt and baggy jeans,
    his baldhead,
    and the smell of shaving cream.
    I sat on the ground next to my brother in awe as he showed us the ropes.
    He smiled down at us from his tattered broken throne.
    In his deep all knowing voice he said it as if we were four- no, back then we were four. “Always remember water puts out fire, fire burns grass”
    and he went on talking for a while after that.
    And every word I took to the heart and carried with me,
    because that piece of information he gave me never really changed.
    He moved away and left my mind for a few years,
    with cousins that tends to happen sometimes,
    but it seems the dead command more of the mind then the living at times like these.
    I never said goodbye to the giant.
    I remember it well when he was sent down the river to the gates of hell.
    I had gotten back from a trip abroad and was playing happily eyes still glittering from my innocent days.
    I ran past mom a little while later and she was on the phone.
    I remember frowning hard as she said the words, “I’m so sorry.”
    I had no idea what it meant.
    she called me to the room and said it straight,
    “Tyler has committed suicide.”
    I almost laughed at first but something told me she was serious.
    The twitch of her eyes
    Her clenched fists
    I bawled and cried for a long time.
    Now my tears are completely dried up.
    Sometimes though in my lackluster eyes I see his dark face in the reflection of my brother’s eyes but only when he speaks,
    the tune of his voice surely shows that the river has taken him far away,
    So now I sit alone and stare, wondering a way to convey the word that I once dreaded to say,
    Good Bye.