• 'Twas the night before X-mas, when all through the towns

    Every creature was singing, and making their rounds;

    The stockings were sitting in houses left bare,

    In hopes that Santa Claus might soon be there;

    The elves were pestering for parts to some toys,

    While gaians were dancing and making some noise;

    And then, in a twinkling, I heard on my house;

    Something that definitely was not a mouse;

    As I jumped from my bed, and was turning around,

    Down through the chimney a cow came with a bound;

    He was dressed in red, from his head to his hoof,

    And I wondered how he'd gotten onto the roof;

    A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

    And he was quite a sight just opening his pack;

    He was chubby and spotted, a right jolly old elf,

    And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

    He left us some presents, and one I did see,

    Was wrapped in green and red, and smiled at me;

    It looked kind of creepy, just sitting right there,

    And that's when I noticed it had claws like a bear;

    As I approached, it began to attack,

    And I knew that this present wanted me for a snack;

    As the cow left it exclaimed to the night,

    "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-fright."