a short draft

• Artist: hazelfrost
• Description: just something i wrote a while ago and found again. so what the hey.
  i plan to go over it and clean it up.
• Date: 07/26/2008
• Tags: drafthazel

if you'd scream any louder they'd put you on mute.
in 18 stale years this'll still give you the boot.
its almost like living in a bubble suit.
they never know when you seek off in hot pursuit.
oh but give them credit they do pay the bills.
until they go crazy and run to the hills.
when you get older they make you take pills.
then when their older you'll be in their wills.
you feel like a bird in a little steel cage.
or an singer thrown up on stage.
if only you were some magical mage.
soon enough you'll get minimum wage.
but until then swallow the rage.

Comments

[NakedJack]

Its good, Schizophrenic Angel is one of those, I'm better than you types with noting to say. A singer, not an singer. All the meanings are nicely hidden in metaphors. It could sound as nonsensical as you'd like, just as long as you can make sense of it.

[Shigekazu Yokichi]

its cool

[Schizophrenic Angel]

It's pretty good, I like the meaning to it >.o. I'd say pick up a better rhyming scheme, it's a bit stale and overused. Get creative! And it is old, so I'd assume you have gotten better xP. We all start out one time or another.

[iShy_Deth_Kitten]

NICE RHYMES