• After falling totally in love, then having my heart broken within a month, I realized I'm completely dependant on people who turn out to be less than what I first thought.
    I judge books not by their cover, but by the pretty dusk cover I put over it. I lie to myself and find the good in people that isn't really there.
    And that's how all this started. First loves are usually things that happen when you're younger and naive. While I am naive, I am not as young as most people when they have their "first love"; a term now bitter-sweet for me to utter. At the age of nearly 17 I've yet to have a relationship that lasted more than a month or two. The longest of which ended in neither or us caring about each other as more than friends. The shortest, however, ended not so easily. "I really do love you," they had told me "but I can't stay with you."
    All I could think was if that were true you wouldn't be dumping me.. and I stick my that, but at the same time understand the thinking: The person really did love me at one point, but didn't anymore, and they were leaving me to save me more heartache. Most people in the world surprising are kind. They don't hurt you on purpose, and they don't enjoy it, but it happens. Just think about all the reasons behind what happened before you act. You may find, like I did, that you're partially to blame for making standard for this person they could live up to. No one's perfect, and no one person is ever at fault.
    Out of this situation I learned something that, if not entirely unwelcome, was important. I expect more of people that they can provide, and I expect more of myself then I can. I also learned that good friends, bad ice-cream, and even worse jokes make a great emotional band-aid.
    And I have some advice that I hope can help anyone who actually read this far: Don't hold on and hope that someone can love you again, or that they'll change their mind; Don't wait around for them to realize their mistake (because it probably was their mistake); Just try moving on, even though it hurts, because we're only human and all we do is love, hate, and hurt.