• "And he thought I was gay?"

    (laughter) "That's because you DO sound gay."

    "That's mean. (drama) You hurt my feelings... *sniff*"

    (laughter) "Well, you are gay, aren't you?"

    "What?" (irritation) "I'm your best friend. How in blazes can I be gay?"

    (tease) "Oh come on, you move and speak just like one!"

    "Look, just because I prefer hanging around girls like you doesn't mean I'm gay."

    (Laughter) "You are so gay."

    "Prove it." (crosses arms)

    "Well, for one, you speak so gay-like, you relate to them."

    "You can relate to them too, but you're not gay, are you?"

    "Okay, okay... Your hand movements are fluid to the point of femininity."

    "If you tell me all of those male dancers in the dance troupe are gay, then they'd have to sue you for libel." (getting impatient)

    "Fine, fine. Then prove that you're NOT gay."

    "You really want me to prove that I'm not gay?" (grabs chair's arms)

    (amused) "Yeah, go ahead!"

    "Okay, you asked for it."

    "You have two chances like I did. Okay?"

    "Fine, fine. If this erases the notion of me being gay, then I say yes."

    (puts head on hands) "First one?"

    "I'm in love with a girl."

    "Ow? *shock*"

    "Seriously."

    "How come you never told me this before?"

    "You'd either hate me or tease me if I told you."

    "Come on, I'm your friend. I'd never hate you or tease you that much."

    (Skeptical look)

    "Okay, okay. I MIGHT tease you. Second?"

    (pause) "Do I have to?"

    "Of course!"

    (pause)

    "What's with the hold up?" (getting irritated)

    (blush) "You will regret this you know."

    "No I won't! Besides, you're blushing! More proof that you're gay!"

    (irritated) "I AM NOT GAY!"

    "Then prove it!"

    (pause) (staring)

    "Final one, I swear."

    "You will regret this."

    "No I won't! Now spill!"

    "*Sigh* Okay... you asked for it."

    "Good!"

    "Close your eyes."

    (confusion) "What?"

    "Just do it!"

    "No way, you might put something gross on..."

    "Just do it already!"

    "No!"

    "I won't tell you if you don't."

    (closes eyes) "There, happy?"

    "Yeah."

    "Well, spill."

    (pause) "*sigh*"

    "What are you wa..."

    (kiss)

    (opens eyes)(mouth still partialy wide and wet)

    (looking down) "I told you, you'd regret it."

    "Wha..."

    (silence)

    (stands up) "Thanks for your time." (turns to leave)

    "Wait!"

    (stops, back still turned) "What?"

    (brick red) "Are....y...you....serious?"

    "What are you talking about?"

    (angry) "I mean this! (points to lips) M...m....me?"

    "*sigh* (turns head) I wouldn't do that if I was kidding, you know me."

    (silence)

    "I'm gonna go now." (starts walking)

    (hesitates) "Wait, come back!"

    (calls out) "Why should I? You probably hate me now, just like the last friend who..."

    "Just come back!"

    (Walks back) "Fine. I'm here. Now what?"

    "Sit." (pulls a chair beside her)

    "*sigh*" (sits)

    "You sigh a lot, you know."

    (impassive) "Yeah, I do. What's it to you?"

    "Maybe you're right. I do hate you."

    (stands) "Is that all?"

    "One last request before you do leave."

    "What?"

    "Sit and close your eyes."

    "Gonna slap me?"

    (hesitates) "Yeah."

    (sits back down and closes eyes) "Fine, do it quick."

    (long silence)

    (irritated)

    "What's wrong? I thought you wanted to sla..."

    (kiss)

    (opens eyes, not breaking kiss)

    (seperates) "Feeling less pessimistic?"

    (shock) "You're joking, aren't you?"

    "I wouldn't do that if I was kidding, you know me."

    (smiles) "Right back at me, isn't it?"

    (smiles) "Well, at least now you don't have to hold back."

    "After what you did to your previous many? I'd be hard pressed to say I am."

    (lays head) "Don't worry. You'd probably be the last."

    "Until graduation?"

    (laughter) "Probably."

    "(drama) That puts my spirits in a damper."

    (both laugh) "That's plenty of time."

    "Yeah, three years."

    "Not gonna cheat on me, are you?"

    "Me, cheat?"

    (skeptical look)

    "Fine, on tests. Nothing more, I promise."

    (smile)

    (looks into eyes) "Well, now I don't have to hold back doing this."

    (gentle smile) "Doing what?"

    "This." (getting closer)

    "What, this?" (gripping hand)

    "No, this." (kiss)

    (stops) "Oh, this." (kiss)

    "Okay, now you're just teasing me."

    "No, this is teasing." (blows into ear)

    (spasm) "Stop already. We look like a gay-lesbian couple."

    (laughter)

    (gaze into eyes) "Let's go?"

    "Sure."




    That day,
    he who had no confidence,
    and she who had too much,

    held hands as they walked home.