• I can't really remember the whole thing because i was 11 at the time, here it goes.

    It was a day just like any other a few days had passed since i saw my father laying down sick, and i knew he went to the hospital, but i didn't see him or my mom for a couple days.
    after a day or a week, my mother comes home and tells me that my father has past on. At first i didn't know either to be sad or mad or what i went to my room thought for a long time, while crying and stuff.

    People all around me were giving us stuff and saying how sorry they were, but i really didn't appreciate that. It just made me sadder and remember him more, and i still felt empty inside when i got gifts and stuff from people. I had a scout master who tried to take my to scouting trips but i hardly felt like camping, it was like he was trying to replace scouting trips for something that was missing.

    I knew this was even worse because my mother has mental problems. Sometimes she had to go to the hospital for months for her depression. Then it was alright because i had my father, but when he passed i didn't want my mother in the hospital, it was lonely with my dad there and having my mom in the hospital, but without him there it was very hard, growing up.

    In my later years i would slowly get over it, but it was complicated because my mother withheld the truth of how my died, and what she did with his body i couldn't forgive her, the first thing which was not as bad but still bad. She told me he died in surgery which gave me nightmares, but then later i found out that she's the one who pulled the plug. Finally the worst thing my mother did was that she told me that he was cremated and later i found out the she actually sold his body to science. Even after all that i can still get choked up about the loss.