• “Just a bit more, just a little bit more,” Danielle chanted to herself as she clutched her belly. Her breathing was heavy and you could hear the sound of her wiping the sweat and tears from her face. You knew that she was running out of time, that the next contraction was only a few minutes away because the whimpering was growing louder.
    “Please...Please!” She screamed to herself, shaking with each word. Her deep sniffs trying to hold everything in, along with her cries of pain were almost too much to bare. In a minute though it would be ten times worse, the pain would be so great that she would have to clench her eyes shut completely, tears still falling and scream to try and force the pain out some way. She reached to her side clumsily and opened both windows letting the cool air and rain hit her happily. In that moment she felt so much better, even Mrs. Cullen would have been able to see her shoulders slump from relaxation from the car behind her...then the pain set in. Danielle screamed, a scream so loud that it echoed on the highway, and she knew that Mrs. Cullen must have heard it. The pain continued for what seemed like a century, she tried to think of something, anything that would take her mind from the encompassing, paralyzing pain. “The rain drops.” Danielle whispered, scarcely loud enough for even herself to hear. She tried to feel every rain drop that touched her left arm; the smell of the cool, moist air, the sound of the elements as they touched her. Finally, her eyes opened just in time for her to swerve away from the side rail.
    Danielle's heart was pounding, her body ached, and her mind raced. Random sounds of pain, discomfort and all around frustration protruded from her mouth and even her body as she tried to concentrate on driving.
    The cool air was helping, but not nearly enough. The phone rang, and Danielle jumped, hitting her overly stuffed belly to the steering wheel. She clutched at her stomach for a moment and reached for the phone, Mrs. Cullen again. She considered for a moment actually giving herself up grasping the light of the phone in her hand so that it showed through the back window. Mrs. Cullen could see her own call, she could see Danielle's eye in the rear view mirror, the fear and the pain, the contemplation that maybe she would give up, maybe she couldn't do this. But just as any sign that Danielle would give up was there it vanished with the light of the phone as it sailed out of her car window into the trees on the side of the highway. Mrs. Cullen saw no other option then to make another phone call.
    Danielle's mind instantly went back to the road. “Just a little bit further, just gotta make it to the state line. State line and I'm home free. We're home free. Together.” Danielle said to herself almost in hysterics, her hand never left her stomach. As she said this she pushed down on the gas a little harder and the engine roared. She had already been going eighty ever since she noticed Mrs. Cullen behind her, but with freedom so close, she was now doing a hundred. With her speed the rain drops on her arm were starting to sting and the air was whirling so fast that she couldn't think straight. I think Danielle enjoyed these moments the best. When she could experience nothing but her and her baby, being there together, with no hurt, no running, no hiding, and no fear, just being together, she was probably just happy with that.
    Another few minutes went by and Danielle's breathing started up again, harder and faster than it hard been yet. But right before the pain kicked in Danielle saw a sign and a small laugh escaped her. “State line...5 mi-” She finished with a scream so loud it probably shook the car. After the scream and the breathing were beginning to be under Danielle's control again she was whimpering and whining, but right underneath the sounds of pain, just below the surface, through the rain and wind there were definitely distinct sounds of her laughing, just a little. Only short bursts but definitely small amounts of happiness. This continued for about five minutes until Mrs. Cullen started backing her car from behind Danielle. She was slowing down and was nearly a mile and a half behind Danielle now. It was at this point that Danielle started hysterically laughing, “We did it, We did it!” She said sniffling, giggling and hyperventilating all at the same time. This was the chant that she continued for about another two minutes, until she saw the state line.
    The state line had a huge “WELCOME!” sign just on the right side of the road, and Danielle noticed that she could see it a lot further away than she normally could, and the reason was because there was a road block, right on the state line with at least ten police officers. Danielle's breathing stopped, and the last thing that was heard on the recorder that Mrs. Cullen had placed in Danielle's government rented vehicle was a small whimper of defeat, and then a blood curtailing scream.
    This next part of the story, I don't know how I know, but I know that it's true. In Danielle's final seconds when she had her last contraction and ran head on into the police block, time froze for her. Right as her contraction began she knew the pain was there and yet she couldn't feel it. She could feel the harsh drops of rain hitting her one by one, one by one she felt each and every drop thundering into her skin, the cold stiff wind pushing the chilling rain further and further up to her elbow as it slowly fell with the other rain drops to the road. Still with all this she felt nothing; she couldn't hear or smell, taste or feel. She had sensations running through her whole body that she had never felt before, like a unbearable storm breaking a damn and letting the flood waters through. In those last moments when Danielle sensed the world and felt nothing, she lost her guilt, her fear, her pain, even her sorrow and basked in the past few months of her life as they flooded into her mind, carrying her away within the rapids of her own consciousness. She thought of the moment she found out she was pregnant and how the tears fell from her eyes with such ease for so many reasons. How she was scared to death that the government would take her baby away because of the overpopulation fifty years ago, and because of that parents had to be mother and father and seen by the government as “ready,” and “suitable,” before they were allowed to keep the child. Otherwise, they were given away to a foster family and never told of their real parents or heard from by their real parents ever again. But then she thought of the joys of the bond between a baby and their mother, how they are instantaneously connected and that was the way that she felt already. The enveloping power of happiness and pride of being a mother was over powering everything else in her mind. She couldn't help being so unbelievably happy to be a mother. The rapids pushed on, taking Danielle to the painful look on her mother's face when she told her, how the government had found out and how they wouldn't let her mother have the baby to raise because she didn't have a husband anymore. She thought back to the anger and fear of having the government step in to her life and because she wasn't a “suitable,” parent they were going to take her baby away from her! Danielle thought of the first time that she met Mrs. Cullen and how she hated her instantly like a Christian hates the Devil, an overpowering, relentless understanding and knowledge that this was the woman who would take everything from her. She knew Mrs. Cullen as the State’s head of the department that was going to take her poor defenseless baby away from his caring and loving mother. She recalled exactly how she looked up through her perfectly done blonde hair and her designer glasses, Danielle wanted nothing more than to wipe them right off her face. She continued to remember how she began to like Mrs. Cullen like a stranger with candy, an ignorant kind of liking that she knew would end her world and possibly her life. Mrs. Cullen had given her everything over the course of her pregnancy, Mrs. Cullen had learned more about her than anyone ever knew. Even toward the end, when Danielle knew she would run she felt badly for Mrs. Cullen, for betraying her.
    In reality, Mrs. Cullen was not betrayed, it was her job as the head of population control to know when one of the pregnancy “victims,” was going to run. And she knew from the moment that Danielle stepped into her office that she was going to be one of them. Still, just as Danielle had grown attached to Mrs. Cullen in return so did she. She had thought of them as friends and over the months she had tried to suggest little hints to Danielle that she would never be able to get out with the baby. But Mrs. Cullen knew Danielle and she knew that would not stop her, she tried to control the whole situation and see Danielle through to the end, but unfortunately she was unable to keep control of the matter. She blamed her inability to save Danielle on her overdeveloped feelings for her.
    Even through all of this; a misshapen friendship, between a Devil and a Christian, a b*****d child whom no one knew the father, and a well developed plan, turned to shreds by the hopeless love of a mother for her child. Still, as Danielle lay on the asphalt, pulled from her vehicle, cut and torn it was Mrs. Cullen who was the first one that she saw when she opened her eyes. At first she didn't say anything she only lay there feeling the rain on her face. Quickly, Mrs. Cullen ripped off her coat and gently placed it under Danielle's head, she smiled slightly.
    “I love the rain.” Danielle said swallowing slowly. Mrs. Cullen could see her bloodied chest rising and falling with great pain. She quickly began to check vitals, making sure Danielle didn't lose too much blood, and feeling for the position of the child inside of Danielle’s belly. All the while, Danielle closed her eyes and enjoyed every drop of the rain as it cascaded over her face. As Mrs. Cullen watched her chest raise and fall.
    “The paramedics will be here in five minutes just hold on,” Mrs. Cullen said, she could hear her voice tremble and as the words tumbled from her mouth with her tears. Still she continued to move, doing whatever she could, positioning Danielle this way and that trying to help her the best she could. She would call for something once or twice but no more than that from the police officers standing by waiting just as she was for the ambulance to arrive. Then once the item in question had been placed in her awaiting hand she would tell the officer to step back again. No one was to be too close except for Mrs. Cullen.
    “I want to you to save my son. You have to do that for me.” Danielle said raising herself slightly with great effort, Mrs. Cullen tried to keep her down but she smacked her hand away clumsily. Her eyes were open now and she was piercing Mrs. Cullen's heart, she stared into her eyes with no mind of herself. In all the time that they had spent together Danielle had never once tried to overpower Mrs. Cullen in strength or power. But now as she gazed at her she stating demands that would not and could not be questioned. “No matter what happens to me. You will save my son. And he will grow up into a strong, healthy man.” As Danielle said these things Mrs. Cullen could see them happen in her mind, she didn't speak or make a sound she only nodded, never breaking eye contact. At this Danielle laid back down and prepared herself.
    Mrs. Cullen felt the tears streaming down her face and was trying hard to hold off any sounds of distress as she continued to wrap Danielle's wounds and try and make her comfortable. Until Danielle made this sound, “Tsk.” Mrs. Cullen always knew that to mean that Danielle had something important on her mind and she wanted it heard. “Something on your mind, Danielle?” Mrs. Cullen always responded. “You know you're like God to a seventeen year old like me.” Mrs. Cullen was completely thrown off by this but before she could respond Danielle continued. “God giveth and God taketh away.” Mrs. Cullen couldn't think of anything. “You watched over me the whole time I was pregnant, listened to me and answered my prayers.” There was a small pause as Danielle's breathing intensified. “But God's not always good, and you have to take the good with the bad. I get everything I need to make my son as perfect as I want him to be, but I never get to see him as perfect. God is kind of cruel that way I guess.”
    At this point Mrs. Cullen was only watching Danielle, she could no longer move. She was staring at a seventeen year old fragile girl, her dark hair blending with the asphalt, her eyes still closed and her features accentuated by the police lights all around her. At that moment, Mrs. Cullen wanted nothing more than to save this girl.
    In one moment everything changed, Danielle was experiencing another contraction and this one was the worst by far. Danielle screamed as loud as her voice could manage. Instantly, Mrs. Cullen had pulled down Danielle's maternity pants and screamed for a knife from the officers behind her, immediately one was placed in her hand and the pants and underwear were cut in half. The baby was starting to crown and Mrs. Cullen wasted no time shouting orders to everyone who would listen, “YOU! Get behind her and hold her at a 45 degree angle and help her push, help her in whatever way she needs!” “You get me some clean, fresh linens, I don't give a damn how, just DO IT!” A dozen other orders were issued before Mrs. Cullen began talking to Danielle again. She was still screaming and trying to breath faster and faster. “Breath Danielle, Breath Honey. Come on you can do this I need a strong push!” Between the wheezing sound of Danielle trying to breathe and the muffled sound of her holding her breathe in as she pushed Danielle only had a moment, “Oh GOD! Something’s wrong!” And another scream. Mrs. Cullen continued on, she was going to save the baby, “GOD DAMN IT DANIELLE PUSH!” Another course scream filled with pain and torture. “Alright Danielle, you're doing great, WHERE ARE THOSE TOWELS!? Just a little more Danielle, you are already past the shoulders, that's the worst part just one more push!” Danielle tried, but something was wrong, she was having trouble breathing. “DANIELLE! One more strong push and your son will be here! NOW PUSH!” That was enough for Danielle, one more strong push, she pushed for everything she had and even what she didn't, she pushed and pushed and didn't breath until she saw him. Her baby boy. He was covered in different ooze, and he was screaming, but he was there, right in front of her. Mrs. Cullen wrapped him in a blanket and covered his face from the rain. And when she looked up Danielle had a look of pure astonishment, the most cow eyed, heart melting look of someone who had first hand experienced a miracle. She didn't say anything and she didn't look any where but at her baby and she reached her arms out for him. Slowly Mrs. Cullen handed him to her and he looked directly into her eyes and stopped crying. And as Danielle held him in her arms and smiled at him, tears fell just as freely as the day she found out she was pregnant. It was like a perfect circle. And just like that, her body slumped and the police officer behind her had to prop her up with all his strength, instantly the baby started to cry again. Mrs. Cullen took the baby quickly from Danielle and the office put her on the asphalt again. He checked her pulse, and she was gone.
    The baby was given to Danielle's 28 year old brother, Kurtis, and his fiance, Samantha when they were told of Danielle's death. He was handed over on the strict conditions that one, they get married immediately and two, that they never tell the boy about his mother, as far as he was concerned they were his real parents. But Uncle Kurtis told me he had his fingers crossed.
    My name is Daniel, named after my mother. I've known about her my entire life and as soon as I could read, uncle Kurtis (Dad in public) got me mom's case file. See, he works in the Population Control Bureau in a separate division then Mrs. Cullen. But here's the curious thing, it was only decided after Danielle's death that I would be given to Uncle Kurtis and Aunt Samantha as an apology for the gross way that the government handled things in her case. Apparently, it was Mrs. Cullen's final act before she retired. Now, either, she didn't know that uncle Kurtis worked in the same Bureau and would have rights to all the files, or she didn't think he would actually tell me, or she secretly wanted me to know everything because she was a true friend to mom.
    I'm guessing it's the last one becauseMrs. Cullen knew mom better than anyone did; based off the case file, the video recordings, and the life story of mom she compiled, she knew the relationship between mom and uncle Kurtis, though they were so far apart, in years and in distance, they were still extremely close. Uncle Kurtis once told me that it would be like keeping a secret from her because of how much we looked the same, same dark hair and blue eyes, even some of my mannerisms he says, “ I got from the womb.” He says that it still hurts him to think that he didn't even know what she was going through, and that she wouldn't call her big brother for help.
    As for me, I'm exactly as perfect as mom wanted me to be, straight A's, on the baseball team and I play a mess of other sports too, getting ready for college next year and I know right where I'm going. I plan to be an elected official so that none of this will ever happen again. I don't think I'll have any problem with my plan either, seeing as I still have someone watching me, who's on my side.
    There are certain ways you can tell if you have a guardian angel, for example, you get random letters in the mail with no return address for birthdays, and Christmas, little tid bits here and there about how I need to “keep it up,” and “I'm doing great,” and my personal favorite, “you mom would be so proud of you.” And they are always signed, God.