• Sucking a drag off of a cigarette, my hand shaking with tremors...
    I swear...I could barely hold onto it.
    I could feel my heart in my rib cage-
    It was still pulsing, though, my head liked to tell me it wasn't.
    Oh...those sweet sweet lies.
    I watched my tears form a puddle on my theighs. My chest heaved,I was crying so hard I thought I would suffocate myself. At the moment, whether I did or not was fine by me. I leaned against the railing of the front porch.
    And then I saw her,walking up the side walk of my street!
    I couldnt breathe,I let go of my cigarette and ran to her. She stopped where she was, her familiar warm smile...and eyes, so big and hazel. It was her...It was her.
    She opened her arms and I hugged her tighter then I ever have in my life...
    "whats wrong sweetie?" she always asked when she thought something was wrong,always.
    "I thought...I thought you left us"
    "no...never ever...I'm not going anywhere,I promise"
    I felt her warmth..her long,thick hair, she was alive.
    I closed my eyes and felt calm,knowing she was okay, and rested my head on her shoulder. she kissed me on the head. It was so peacefull, but only for a moment.
    I fell to the ground.
    I had been holding nothing but air.
    This...was nothing but an illusion...wishful thinking on my part.
    She was gone. Gone.