• Rain

    I stood in the rain, each drop feeling like a small beesting. Nothing was audible through the downpour, my own thoughts a dull whisper. Or they would have been, if i had thought. But there wasn't much to think about at the moment: only that there was nothing to think about.

    so when i heard the twigs snap it didn't register right away, and when the growl rang out i was too cold to notice. The rain made me stiff, and my soaked clothes were clinging to me like dead-weights, so i couldn't have moved too far anyway. But truthfully, i think it was the fear that made my muscles immoble. For i fanally heard the bushes. I finally noticed the signs: i was not alone.

    Thinking back, i realize that there was nothing that could be done, there never was. It was always too late. And those last moments of rain, those last moments of dark surrounding water, would forever be my image of the world i once knew.


    Sweat crawled across my brow and pooled in a curve of the wood beside my head. My face was flushed yet my forehead held the color of a ripe red apple. I felt as if a fire had been lit inside my bones. But at the same time I thought my blood had frozen. My stomach twisted and I coughed, a raspy sound that shot pain down my throat. I jerked and contorted my body, writhing from the pain that lingered in every limb, refusing to leave. I panted as I fought it, there were no short cuts. The only way to be free was to fight. I wanted to be free.

    a battle i cant win

    i could have fought back. i could have won. i could have lived to mourn his death. but how could i fight my best friend? He was corrupted, brainwashed, whatever you want to call it, but he was still John. He was still my closest companion. So i didn't duck when the dagger came flying, and i didn't wince when it raked through my leg, and i didn't scream when my thigh turned red. I didn't cry when the blade cut cleanly through my middle, and i didn't mourn when the blood poured out, and i didn't shout when the world began to fade. but i did shed a tear when i remembered what I'd lost.