The New Secret Host! Chp.1

• Artist: xx3OH3xx
• Description: Hello all you ouran high school host club lovers!I have been watching some episodes of ouran host club (repeatedly) and it came to me that I should be in it to!There will be lots of funnies,some action and also some new crushes~ please coment what you think~
• Date: 06/18/2009
• Tags: secret host chp1

An boy the age of 16 with short brown hair that spiked in the back,he was 5`2 and also had big crystal blue eyes walked in his home which was an mansion.“Yukari im home” He said.He waited for an responce but no answer.He shrugged and started searching for Yukari.The boy went into his and Yukari`s room.“now where could she be hiding....” He said to hiself.Before could Think more he could feel something pushed him down like an animal.“yaaaaay i got you Yosuke-kun~” Yukari said with an cute laugh.Yukari was four inches shorter than Yosuke.She also had an more feminem body but was really female looking since she had an identical twin brother.The hair was even the same.“owwwwww Yukari becareful you allmost killed me” he said jokingly.As they got up Yukari smiled “so how was your day?”
To Be Continued (XDDD lol)

Comments

[ayamecullen09]

oh my g lol luvrs ur name

[xx3OH3xx]

^^;;;; thanks guys i`ll do that

[StarlessRaven]

You might want to put the people speaking in paragraphs,but the story line is good.

[The Demon Khoshekh]

i would like to point out one major fault in this (one writer to another ya know >_o) never start out wit describing everything about your character. Gradually describe him through out the story (or fan fic) that way it dosent sound so rushed.

you also might want to look up story structure. everytime a new person speaks, it is supposed to be the start of a new paragraph. If you pick up any book and look at how it is structured, you may get what I am saying.

I hope this helped