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  • Artist Info: Enough crap, my name's not Saber, it's Sean. I'm a middle schooler who hides behind a wall of jokes and smiles. I am usually the kid who tries to make everyone's day better by telling jokes and smiling, laughing, but all that is just an act. I constantly have thoughts of suicide, slitting my wrists, hanging myself, jumping. I don't think anyone would be upset about my death, except the guys who have to scrape me off a side walk. I've cut more than once, somewhere around three and five times, two of those times were life threatening. I don't know why I saved myself, I really don't, I regret my decisions, not the decisions to cut, the ones to stop when I start. Usually my wall hides the real me, but every once and awhile my suicidial-self brakes through. It happens when I am alone with my thoughts, my thoughts of how ugly and worthless I am. I don't want anyone's pitty or apologizies, they don't have anything to be sorry for. It's me that has messed up my life, not them. The only reason I posted this is to get it off my chest, I don't want to feel like I do, typing this is taking away the pain with every letter. If you are reading this sentence, I thank you, you care about a boy who is afraid of himself, afraid of what he might do to himself, enough to read his story. Thank you.
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