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My son came home from school one day,
with a smirk upon his face.
he'd decided he was smart enough,
to put me in my place.

"Guess what i learned in civics two,
that's taught by Mr. Wright?
It's all about the laws today
' the children's Bill of Rights'."

"It says i need not clean my room,
don"t have to cut my hair.
No one cane tell me what to think,
or speak, or what to wear."

"I have freedom from religion,
and regardless of what you say,
I don't have to bow my head,
and i sure dont have to pray."

"I can wear earring if i want,
and pierce my tongue & nose,
i can read & watch just what i like,
and get tattoos head to toe."

"And if you ever spank me,
I'll charge you with a crime.
I'll back up all my charges
with the marks on my behind."

"Don't you ever touch me,
my body's only for my use.
Not for your hugs and kisses
That's just more child abuse."

"Don't preach about your morals,
like your mama did to you.
That's nothing more then mind control,
and it's illegal too."

"Mom, I have these children's rights
so you can't influence me,
or I'll call Children's Services Division,
better knows as C. S. D. "

Of course my first instinct was
To toss him out the door.
But the chance to teach a lesson
Made me think a little more.

I mulled it over carefully,
I couldn't let this go.
A smiles crept upon my face,
"He's messing with a pro."

The next day I took him shopping
to the local goodwill store.
I told him "Pick out all you want,
there's shirts & pants galore".

"I've called and checked with C. S. D.,
who said they didn't care
if i bout you only K-Mart shoes
instead of those Nike Airs."

"And I've cancelled that appointment
to take your driver's test.
The C. S. D. is unconcerned,
so I'll decide what's best."

I said "No time to stop and eat
or pick up stuff to munch.
And tomorrow you can start to learn
to make your own sack lunch".

"Just save that raging appetite,
and wait 'til dinner time.
We're having liver and onions,
a favorite dish of mine."

He asked, "can i please rent a movie,
to watch on my VCR?"
"Sorry, but i sold your TV
for new tired on my car."

"I also rented out your room,
you'll take the couch instead.
The C. S. D. requires
just a roof above your head."

"Your clothing won't be trendy now,
and I'll choose what we eat.
That allowance that you used to get
will by me something neat."

I'm selling off your jet ski,
dirt bike & roller blades.
Check out the 'Parent's Bill of Rights'
It's in effect today!"

"Hey hot shot, are you crying?
And why are you on your knees?
Are you asking god to help you out,
instead of C. S. D.?"

my grandma gave this to my mom and she just gave it to me i had to share it its funny as hell XD